2) After a challenging start to the year, my husband Tim and I have gotten closer and smarter about supporting each other. As most of you know, we are great for each other. Specific innovations are biweekly listening time; an informal course I’m taking from Tim that I call "You’re good, but drop the defensiveness;" frequent broccoli and spinach omelets by resident chef Tim; and mutual adherence to the "green card" house rule. The green card reads, "Please refrain from discouraging or negative comments. Encouragement always welcome."
3) By asking for and expecting support, I’ve built a stronger community around myself. Concretely, 65 people supported me in my recent women’s workshop fundraising project. Thank you! Laughing at the Holyland restaurant with Lori and Jen and regular walking chats with Nathan, Melanie, Kirsten, Karen C. and Karen R. were huge gifts as well. Lastly, I have taken more pride and ownership in my co-counseling community (i.e. RC) in this last year than ever before.
4) Having a more relaxed schedule in 2006 gave me the mental space to try some new health habits. One new habit is doing regular push-ups. My record, thus far, is 260 pushups in two sets (yep, on my toes). I find pushups an effective way to overcome psychological struggles around expectations and success. In the area of eating, I’m experimenting with putting my energy into two nutritious meals a day (usually breakfast and lunch). Trusting my own thinking, in consultation with knowledgeable friends, has proven itself useful. I recommend the book "Meal by Meal" by Donald Altman for those seeking inspiration in this area.
5) Over the last year, many people have helped me "fit in" better socially. Fitting in is part of my larger goal of eliminating barriers to closeness and connection with all people. Co-counselors in Seattle, Grand Forks, NYC, Milwaukee, Providence and the Twin Cities have all laid the foundation for this shift. Melanie’s consignment store tip (Turnsyle in Plymouth) and following the advice of my Canadian fashion consultant have also increased my comfort in a variety of social settings, including job interviews.
6) Acting on my passion for women’s issues has made my life bigger and spurred development in many of my relationships. Raising money to go to a national RC women’s workshop was precedent setting for me. The blog of my workshop experience is currently under construction but I plan to have it largely completed by February 4th. Other feminist actions I’m glad I took in 2006 include: leading an amazing RC women’s support group for a second year; attending an RC women and physical power workshop in Milwaukee; writing and sharing feminist book reports and initiating a birthday gathering of female friends where we celebrated our reproductive decisions.
7) Learning is a gift I plan to give myself every year. This year I learned how to dive into a swimming pool; how to negotiate with a potential employer; how a doctor trained in conventional and complementary medicine can help me think about my health; how to handle my email better; how to make an omelet and how to organize and prioritize my reading materials. Speaking of reading material, one thing I learned from Nygaard Notes this year is that Jeff Nygaard and I agree on the importance of working toward a vision (issue #327).
8) Making a commitment to regular walking meditation has taught me about myself and reinforced my belief in the value of single-tasking. I’m particularly pleased with my experiments in one day silent retreats at home. On these days I practice mindfulness while I do regular tasks, read "Coming to Our Senses" by Jon Kabat-Zinn, write, walk in nature, avoid electronic distractions, smile a lot and pass notes to my ever-patient and much amused husband.
9) In 2006 I began to intentionally incorporate what I think of as art therapy into my life. So far this has manifest itself as putting flowers in the bathroom, sending fun snail mail to Cy and Sabrina, creating this blog, committing to regular massage therapy (follow link to contact Kristine in Minneapolis--she's excellent), watching movies and updating my recommendations, walking to the park with my mom’s daycare kids, making ShrinkyDinks and telling jokes (*pirate joke at the bottom).
10) Visiting Julia in Calgary was a delight. For those of you who know her, enough said. For others, imagine the type of woman who would walk back after finishing her own marathon in order to be with you and cheer you on.
11) I was surprised by my desire to serve my country (i.e. patriotism) when I interviewed for a position at the Minneapolis VA Hospital. I now understand this patriotism as wanting to play an active role in helping veterans heal. A second gift from this VA job interview was being asked about the women’s support group I lead. I was both surprised and pleased to have a chance to openly integrate my community social justice work and my professional work life.
Back-story
This last year was particularly rich for me because I took advantage of the time I had available to think about my life. Specifically, when my position at the University ended, I thought in detail about what I would do with my life if I didn’t need to work for a living. I then implemented as much of that thinking as I could. Thank you to everyone who has listened to me during this process.
My Goal for 2007
My goal for 2007 is for my life as an employed person to be closer to my "ideal life" now that I’ve been able to step back and structure my life around my top 11 priorities (see boldface words above).
Don't forget to check out my 2006 photos related to these 11 gifts.
*Joke: A pirate walks into a bar with an enormous steering wheel stuck down his pants. The bartender can’t help but ask, "What’s with the steering wheel?" "ARRRRGGH," the pirate answers, "it’s drivin’ me nuts."
1 comment:
Well written article.
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